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> Guilty Fap Pleasures That Isn't Locked, I disgust even myself
Dog botherer
post Feb 4 2010, 07:26 AM
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QUOTE(Dare @ Feb 2 2010, 05:31 AM) *

I presume your guilty fap pleasure is the big zulu at the back.

That's Les Ferdinand, that is.
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Your Mum
post Feb 11 2010, 11:07 AM
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QUOTE(Dare @ Feb 2 2010, 01:31 PM) *

I presume your guilty fap pleasure is the big zulu at the back.


You presume wrong, squire. I would in fact be moved, either by the offer of violence or perhaps cash, to commit a moderate/severe sexual assault on members of the mid nineties Jackson family in the following order:

Young Billy
Bianca
Zulu Alan
Robbie
Little retard Sonia
The Mother, whatever her fucking name is. Jesus - In this case, the money would have to be big, or the violence extreme.

nimnimnim.gif
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Bible_John
post Apr 10 2010, 09:40 AM
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Hitler's bit of fluff.

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Compared to Gordon Brown, the man's got taste.

I don't know about Nick Clegg, but what with him being a Lib Dem and all I'm assuming his Mrs is probably a thin-lipped, cravat wearing man named Xavier.
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Deacon_Gusset
post Apr 10 2010, 08:53 PM
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QUOTE(Bible_John @ Apr 10 2010, 10:40 AM) *

Hitler's bit of fluff.

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Compared to Gordon Brown, the man's got taste.

I don't know about Nick Clegg, but what with him being a Lib Dem and all I'm assuming his Mrs is probably a thin-lipped, cravat wearing man named Xavier.

No No NO! She is a sexless fucking freak. Those "modelling" shots that the Mail had the other week? The one where you could glimpe a bit of gusset made me want to vomit. And I'm not choosy.
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Bible_John
post Apr 12 2010, 06:27 AM
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QUOTE(Deacon_Gusset @ Apr 10 2010, 09:53 PM) *

The one where you could glimpe a bit of gusset made me want to vomit.


You mean this one?

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Compare that to Nick Clegg. Though I was shocked to find he wasn't a chutney ferret, his Mrs looks like a boot-faced tuppence licker who works as a LGBT outreach worker for the district council.

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Dare
post Apr 12 2010, 08:00 AM
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QUOTE(Bible_John @ Apr 12 2010, 07:27 AM) *
...LGBT...



Lesbian, Gay, Bacon and Tomato?
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Ponky
post Apr 12 2010, 08:53 AM
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QUOTE(Bible_John @ Apr 12 2010, 07:27 AM) *

QUOTE(Deacon_Gusset @ Apr 10 2010, 09:53 PM) *

The one where you could glimpe a bit of gusset made me want to vomit.


You mean this one?

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We must... *puff* *puff*... mend... *pant* *fap* broken Britain..
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Your Mum
post Apr 12 2010, 11:58 AM
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QUOTE

No No NO! She is a sexless fucking freak. Those "modelling" shots that the Mail had the other week? The one where you could glimpe a bit of gusset made me want to vomit. And I'm not choosy.


Worse, she's a sexless Tory fucking freak. It's not fair on the regular sexless freaks to leave out that important distinction. Saying that slimy cunt Cameron has got 'taste compared to Gordon' is like saying Huntley has excellent child management skills 'compared to Herod'.
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matt
post Apr 12 2010, 11:21 PM
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QUOTE(Your Mum @ Apr 12 2010, 12:58 PM) *
Saying that slimy cunt Cameron has got 'taste compared to Gordon' is like saying Huntley has excellent child management skills 'compared to Herod'.


Huntley: 2 children
Herod: His sons, and all male children under two in Bethlehem

Are you posting from Conservative Central Office? Because if not, they need you, as the ability to distinguish between shit and shite could make all the difference.
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Orla
post Apr 13 2010, 07:19 AM
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YM, under shit lighting, yesterday
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Your Mum
post Apr 15 2010, 04:46 PM
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I stand by my assesment of their rrelative evils, and this is only because Cameron hasn't had a chance to fuck up yet.

Considering I look like a vagrant, stinking, LSD fried Jesus Christ I'd be pretty surprised If they'd have me, to be honest.. Perhaps a some kind of token junkie minority representative.

nimnimnim.gif

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YM, Checking Belmsford yesterday.
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Bible_John
post Apr 16 2010, 08:05 AM
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QUOTE(Your Mum @ Apr 15 2010, 05:46 PM) *

I stand by my assesment of their rrelative evils, and this is only because Cameron hasn't had...


You illiterate spacker.

Anyway. Cameron seriously flunked that leaders' debate last night. Up against a barely functioning autistic soviet and a fuckawful, social workerish liberal cunt anyone else would have had a field day. Yet all we got was "When I took my dead mong son into the clap clinic this" and "when I had to fill in forms to get money for my dead mong son that..."
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Huge gleaming nigger cock.
post Apr 28 2010, 08:25 PM
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Gardening alien Alys Fowler.
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She's got an intense way about her.
She'll be chewing a sour stem of elm or something, and suddenly there's a bit of this basilisk glare :
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...which convinces me she puts everything up her bottom at least twice to see if it makes the grade.


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blasted
post Apr 29 2010, 10:07 AM
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QUOTE(Huge gleaming dancing, laughing gentleman budgie. @ Apr 28 2010, 09:25 PM) *

Gardening alien Alys Fowler.
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She's got an intense way about her.
She'll be chewing a sour stem of elm or something, and suddenly there's a bit of this basilisk glare :
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...which convinces me she puts everything up her bottom at least twice to see if it makes the grade.


Nigel you div, Alys isn’t a guilty fap pleasure. I openly admit that given the opportunity I would give her the worst sexual experience she has ever had*.

*On account of me being shit.
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Ponky
post Apr 29 2010, 11:04 AM
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I think she'd be about as much of a good shag as a handful of "simply fabulous beetroots I grew in a bucket of shit on my urban roof terrace".

I mean she's ginger, looks like a guinea pig and probably self-harms.
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Huge gleaming nigger cock.
post Apr 29 2010, 11:05 AM
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QUOTE(blasted @ Apr 29 2010, 11:07 AM) *

[ Alys isn’t a guilty fap pleasure.
She's ginger, nearly vegetarian, and as I suggested, possibly not female at all. It's like a pair of nice thighs on a creepy-crawlie, or from some angles, a rotting branch in wellies.

Though, presumably, prolonged experience of your mum would make Alys seem like a comfy place to rest, indeed.
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Dare
post Apr 29 2010, 01:51 PM
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Should somone not point out to her that she's spelled her name wrong.
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Stazi
post Apr 29 2010, 02:44 PM
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QUOTE(Ponky @ Apr 29 2010, 12:04 PM) *

I mean she's ginger, looks like a guinea pig and probably self-harms.


Arse
Mouth
Cheek pouches
Gaping wounds (while she's asleep)
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Don Juan
post May 28 2010, 01:31 AM
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Fu*k off stazi you stupid cockheaded wank pistol
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